“Whitney Cummings has written a book about being, well, not fine—and what to do when you find yourself with brutal anxiety and a co-dependency disorder; all in her trademark wit, humor, and honesty. This book, however, is fine as hell.”—Sophia Amoruso, author of #Girlboss “The funniest cry for help you'll read this year.”—BJ Novak Well, well, well. Look at you, ogling my book page....I presume if you’re reading this it means you either need more encouragement to buy it or we used to date and you’re trying to figure out if you should sue me or not. Here are all the stories and mistakes I’ve made that were way too embarrassing to tell on stage in front of an actual audience; but thanks to not-so-modern technology, you can read about them here so I don’t have to risk having your judgmental eye contact crush my self-esteem. This book contains some delicious schadenfreude in which I recall such humiliating debacles as breaking my shoulder while trying to impress a guy, coming very close to spending my life in a Guatemalan prison, and having my lacerated ear sewn back on by a deaf guy after losing it in a torrid love affair. In addition to hoarding mortifying situations that’ll make you feel way better about your choices, I’ve also accumulated a lot of knowledge from therapists, psychotherapists, and psychopaths, which can probably help you avoid making the same mistakes I’ve made. Think of this book as everything you’d want from the Internet all in one place, except without the constant distractions of ads, online shopping, and porn. I’m not sure what else to say to say, except that you should buy it if you want to laugh and learn how to stop being crazy. And if we used to date, see you in court.
I slept through my first labour. Eventually a midwife woke me. ‘It’s time to push,’ she said, pointing to the machine that was monitoring my baby. It showed contraction after contraction, spiking and declining with mountainous patterns like the heart rate machines on medical shows. Beside the machine was my husband, Steve’s, face, watching me closely, complete with massive eye bags from worry and exhaustion; it appeared that while I’d been sleeping he’d been on high alert. Taking one for the team, you could say, which was only fair because apparently — I was about to push an entire human through my hoo-ha. With her career down the toilet, a husband who was never home, a baby screaming non-stop and her cries for help falling on deaf ears, Megan Blandford spent years saying, 'I’m fine'. Spoiler alert (not really): she wasn’t fine. Megan sank into postnatal depression and anxiety, with a highly negative inner voice leading the charge in the battle for better mental health. Until Megan faced a life-changing question: What if the enemy inside isn’t the enemy after all? I'm Fine (and other lies) is a touching true story of motherhood: the challenges it presents, and the hope that can be found within it. 'I could kiss this book. I’m Fine (and other lies) was such an unexpected wonder...I’m Fine is the Mother’s Day read we all owe ourselves. Beautifully written, moving and powerful, it is a challenge to the stigma of not just postnatal depression, but all mental illness. I am so very glad I read this uplifting book and I look forward to more writing from Megan Blandford.' — Robert O'Hearn, Booktopia
Interwoven with tales of World War I, this is a story about growing up, moving on and the strength of a family. Things haven't been going so well for fifteen-year-old Esther Armstrong. With her brother Max - her closest ally - absent, she's forced to face everything alone, not least her parents' heated arguments. As the summer holidays stretch endlessly ahead, she's desperate for something, anything, to divert her attention. Then she finds some letters hidden in the walls of her family home, sent by a soldier to his sweetheart from the trenches of WWI. Esther is consumed by the mystery of these lovers - not very much older than herself - and what became of them. Perhaps in piecing together the jigsaw of someone else's life, Esther can work out how to reassemble her own, and how to make everything fine again...
Travel writer Claire Spencer doesn't believe in fate, much less any part of that fairy tale, happy ending, love at first sight stuff. Especially not for Amazon-sized women like her. So when Jack, the sexy man who sits next to her on a flight from New York to London, asks her out, Claire figures there has to be a catch. Is he blind? Sleazy? On the rebound? But she decides to accept, and finds herself smitten and a little frightened at how happy she is with how fast things are moving. While in London (on assignment for Sassy Seniors! magazine), Claire is also looking forward to seeing her best friend, Maddy, one of those impossibly gorgeous, if-I-didn't-love-her-I'd-hate-her women who's got everything in the world going for her--except that, for the first time in her trouble-free life, Maddy has just been dumped...by Jack. Claire's finally met what seems to be the perfect guy, and now the only way she can have him is by betraying her best friend. It's almost enough to make Claire believe in Fate, but if Fate does exist, it seems intent on screwing her over.
Author Barbra Minar writes about excelling in life in spite of disease and disabilities. Since 1960 she has battled systemic lupus erythematosus. In l985 with new medical complications Minar wrestled with a deep depression. She decided to tackle her denial, accept her situation, and find health. Using her journal entries and letters, she shares experiences and practical tips, combining support and understanding. When illness limits us, Minar shows how to discover rich new emotional, physical, and spiritual paths. WALKING INTO THE WIND is her fourth book. Praise for WALKING INTO THE WIND: Being Healthy With A Chronic Disease An open and compassionate description of how systemic lupus erythematosus struck body and soul. Minar describes with great honesty the challenge the disease has posed on her own emotions, her spirituality, her relationships. . . . . However, her book is more about life than about a chronic disease. The stormy winds of her chronic disease have finally become a lifting force to higher values of truth and life. H. RICHARD BARTHEL, MD, RHEUMOTOLOGIST An extraordinary story. Minar has turned the malevolence of lupus back on itself and recorded the process. You discover you can become a wiser and more powerful person than a normally healthy woman ever dreamed of becoming." DIANE DE AVALLE-ARCE Editor, Reviewer, Literary Critic I felt as though I was eavesdropping on your life. But thats exactly what I needed. Ive kept so much inside me for the past 3 1/2 years that Ive been sick. Thank you, Barbra, for being so human. The way you have allowed God to work in you is an inspiration to me." VICKI EWY Barbra Minar offers a gracious gift to the world. JOSEPH F. COHEN, MD.
"Jen offers up all the gory details of a life permanently in progress. She reassures you that it's okay to not have life completely figured out, even when you reach middle age (and find your first gray pubic hair). She talks about making unusual or unpopular life decisions (such as cultivating a 'friend with benefits' or not going home for the holidays) because you don't necessarily want for yourself what everyone else seems to think you should. It's about renting when everyone says you should own, dating around when everyone thinks you should settle down, and traveling alone when everyone pities you for going to Paris without a man"--Amazon.com.
Here are more scathingly funny tales from the wild side! Laurie Notaro survived the debauched ride of her twenties and the bumpy road to matrimony. Now she’s ready to take on the thirtysomething years . . . and almost middle age has never been more hilarious. Laurie is married, mortgaged, and now—miraculously—employed in the corporate world, discovering that bosses come in all shapes, sizes, and degrees of mental stability. After maxing out her last good credit card at Banana Republic, she’s dressed for success and ready to face the jungle: surviving feral, six-foot-plus Gretchen (“Three Thousand Faces of Eve”) before battling the overbearing, overstuffed (in way-too-small pants) new mom Suzzi, who ruthlessly cancels Laurie’s newspaper column and learns that payback can be a bitch. Laurie also explores the backstabbing world of preschoolers at a Halloween party, the X-rated madness of a family trip to Disneyland, and the pressure from her QVC-addicted mother and the rest of the world to reproduce. But while losing more friends to babies than to booze, she realizes there’s a plus side: at least for a couple of months she gets to be the thinner friend. I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies) is Laurie Notaro at her deliciously quirky best. Can a woman prone to what her loved ones might term “meltdowns” (she considers them “Opportunities to Enlighten”) put a smile on her face and love everybody? Take a guess.
There is no question that being a mother is challenging, but this fun, frank, and prescriptive guide tries to do the impossible and make new motherhood easier. This upbeat and entertaining book drives home the point that new moms are not alone and that there are things they can do to make motherhood a little more controllable and lot more enjoyable. Featuring interviews with hundreds of moms and candid stories from author Claudine Wolk’s own experiences as a mother, It Gets Easier!...and Other Lies We Tell New Mothers mixes humor, honesty, and insider strategies that will give new moms a “leg-up.” This upbeat and entertaining book drives home the point that new moms are not alone and that there are things they can do to make motherhood a little more controllable and lot more enjoyable. It addresses such issues as: • “The Talk” you need to have with your husband before you give birth • what you really need to know about labor and delivery • the importance of a baby schedule (no matter what anyone else says) • the 6 Baby Commandments that can foster good eating and sleeping habits • 5 new mom mantras that will help keep you sane • body image after giving birth • how to keep housework to a minimum Complete with resources for further exploration and a helpful glossary, this funny, irreverent book will help ease every new mother’s frustration.
At twenty-two years old, Kerri Shepherd was on the verge of success. Her first novel had been published and she was preparing for a successful career as an author. All her dreams seemed to be coming true. But three years later, she still hasn't written a word. After the death of her father (a father who had abandoned the family seventeen years earlier), Kerri finds herself moving away from Toronto to the small Georgian Bay town of New Ferndale. Will the change of scenery help her overcome her writer's block? Or will she be too distracted by the men in her life; Denny (her first love), Carter (the small-town lawyer), and Duncan (her new neighbor)? And can she keep her sanity once her newly-divorced sister moves in with her? Family secrets are revealed and old wounds are exposed as Kerri realizes that love and happiness may not be the lies she always thought they were.
A hilarious collection of motherhood fallacies includes such misstatements as "You'll get used to throwing up" and "You can nap when your baby naps," and is accompanied by drawings by a cartoonist for The New Yorker. Original. 25,000 first printing.
'There is no such thing as autobiography, there is only art and lies'. Set in a London of the near future, its three principal characters, Handel, Picasso and Sappho, separately flee the city and find themselves on the same train, drawn to one another through the curious agency of a book. Stories within stories take us through the unlikely love-affairs of one Doll Sneerpiece, an 18th century bawd, and into the world of painful beauty where language has the power to heal. Art & Lies is a question and a quest: How shall I live?
If At First You Don't Succeed For two years, Justice Turnbull has paced his room at Halo Valley Security Hospital, planning to escape. Justice has a mission-one that began with a vicious murder two decades ago. And there are so many others who must be sent back to the hell that spawned them. . . Kill. . . Laura Adderley didn't plan to get pregnant by her soon-to-be ex-husband, though she'll do anything to protect her baby. But now reporter Harrison Frost is asking questions about the mysterious group of women who live at Siren Song lodge. Harrison hasn't figured out Laura's connection to the story yet. But Justice knows. And he is coming. . . Then Kill Again. . . All her life, Laura has been able to sense approaching evil. But that won't stop a psychopath bent on destroying her. Justice has been unleashed, and this time, there will be no place safe to hide. . . Praise for Wicked Game "Chilling. . . Swift pacing and an intriguing plot make this a first-rate supernatural thriller." --Publishers Weekly (starred review)
When a small-town beauty queen becomes a target, a rugged federal agent sets out to investigate—only to find that there’s more to her than meets the eye. Pageant winner Lacie Jo Baxter was born and bred to dazzle; with the perfect smile, the perfect figure, the perfect facade of heartland innocence. But deep inside are pent-up desires and a daring that’s never been tested—until an abductor nearly snatches her up. Improvising a weapon out of her twirling baton, Lacie fends off the attacker, then comes face-to-face with the kind of man they don’t make in Kansas anymore. Chicago-born FBI agent Ben Camaglia has a taste for the good life, an eye for women, and a knack for combining the two. Exiled from the Windy City, Ben expects to crack this little kidnapping caper and return to the big leagues. Instead, he quickly discovers that beneath Lacie’s incredible looks is a cocktail of lies and secrets. Sparks fly when they’re together, but danger swirls around a woman who is so irresistible that someone will not let her go.
Jane Ryland was a rising star in television news...until she refused to reveal a source and lost everything. Now a disgraced newspaper reporter, Jane isn't content to work on her assigned puff pieces, and finds herself tracking down a candidate's secret mistress just days before a pivotal Senate election. Detective Jake Brogan is investigating a possible serial killer. Twice, bodies of unidentified women have been found by a bridge, and Jake is plagued by a media swarm beginning to buzz about a "bridge killer" hunting the young women of Boston. As the body count rises and election looms closer, it becomes clear to Jane and Jake that their cases are connected...and that they may be facing a ruthless killer who will stop at nothing to silence a scandal. Dirty politics, dirty tricks, and a barrage of final twists, The Other Woman is the first in an explosive new series by Hank Phillippi Ryan. Seduction, betrayal, and murder—it'll take a lot more than votes to win this election. At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.
From the New York Times bestselling author of Confessions of a Scary Mommy and the wildly popular blog ScaryMommy.com, a hilarious new essay collection that exposes the “vicious lies” that every parent is told. Newly pregnant and scared out of her mind, Jill Smokler lay on her gynecologist’s examination table and was told the biggest lie she’d ever heard in her life: “Motherhood is the most natural thing in the world.” Instead of quelling her nerves like that well intentioned nurse hoped to, Jill was instead set up for future of questioning exactly what DNA strand she was missing that made the whole motherhood experience feel less than natural to her. Wonderful? Yes. Miraculous? Of course. Worthwhile? Without a doubt. But natural? Not so much. Jill’s first memoir, the New York Times bestseller Confessions of a Scary Mommy, rocketed to national fame with its down and dirty details about life with her three precious bundles of joy. Now Jill returns with all-new essays debunking more than twenty pervasive myths about motherhood. She’s here to give you what few others will dare: The truth.
Natasha Conrad is a private investigator. She helps John Clark find his brother. Even though she and he have to go to a couple different states. There is this detective Chuck Mooney that helps Natasha, but they also find out they love and have feelings for each other. Then Natasha finds out that her mother is having bad dreams and tries to help her figure them out. There is romance, suspense and lies and deception.
Seducing the boss is the best way to uncover the truth in this story from USA TODAY bestselling author Barbara Dunlop After his ex writes a tell-all book, CEO Shane Colborn is battling a PR nightmare. The last thing he needs is an affair with another woman, especially one who works for him. But Darci Rivers proves impossible to resist. Their passion is intense, but so is Darci's secret. She's out to discover a truth that could redeem her father's legacy—and destroy Shane's company, taking him down with it. Will she do what she's come to do…and risk the once-in-a-lifetime connection she's found with her boss?